25 Things I learned in My First Year of Motherhood:
1. There is no such thing as holding your baby too much.
2. If you stop for a diaper change on a road trip never assume your husband fastened the car seat when putting it back on the base. And also freaking out on the highway and shouting at your husband "we are gonna kill our baby" is a bit too melodramatic.
3. You won't feel like yourself for quite some time. In fact you may forget parts of who you are at times.
4. You will feel like yourself again. And you will learn about the new parts of yourself.
5. There is such a thing as projectile poop.
6. Poop does come off the wall with a little elbow grease and soap.
7. Many people will give you advice. Much of it will be wrong. Ignore that loud voice in your head telling you that you don't know what to do and trust your instincts.
8. Time will go slow but at the same time fly by you before you can catch your breath so savor every second.
9. Babies put things in their mouth. No, seriously they put anything with in reach in their mouth. It's a good idea to know where your loose change is at all times.
10. You will cry as much as your baby but it's okay.
11. You will laugh as much as your baby but don't be surprised if not everyone thinks your baby's adorable antics are as funny as you.
12. You will feel sexy again...one day. Probably not on the day you have spit up dried in a crusty knot in your hair.
13. Other people's crying babies can make your nipples leak.
14. You will learn you are capable of much more than you realized.
15. You will learn you can be a good mother and human at the same time.
16. You will get sleep again...and then you won't...and then you will again.
17. You will drive more like you are 80 years old than ever before.
18. You will make a fool of yourself just to hear that baby giggle...over and over.
19. You will worry, worry, worry about your baby. Then call your mother and apologize for the last 30 years.
20. You will become addicted to the baby monitor staring at it many nights like it will reveal the cure to cancer.
21. Your heart will grow about 11 sizes bigger.
22. You will need help.
23. It's okay to accept help.
24. You are strong enough to handle this even when you dont think you are.
25. Nothing could have prepared you for the sheer fabulousness or utter messiness of motherhood.